shadows and flaws. inconsistencies, or refractions of glory?

john 5.44. i want for my heart to be cleansed, to be freed to think nothing of the praise of men, and to be so fixed on the face of Jesus that my concern is only for His pleasure.
for my eyes to be locked with His. and to be unable to tear them away. for mine to be so seared with His face that everything else i look upon is seen through Him. and, kinda like when you see reflections when someone wears sunnies, for others to see His face when they look at me.
what a prospect!

i want to not be a chameleon. i want to be assured of who i am. i want to not be hyper conscious of when i speak about Him and His work. i want it to be natural. i want people to be comfortable.
if these things are for Your glory, please make them come to pass.