jitter

When I am consumed by my problems – stressed out by my life, my family, my job – I actually convey the belief that I think the circumstances are more important than God’s command to always rejoice. In other words, that I have a “right” to disobey God because of the magnitude of my responsibilities.

Worry implies that we don’t quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what is happening in our lives.

Stress says that the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace toward others, or our tight grip of control.

Basically, these two behaviors communicate that it’s ok to sin and not trust God because the stuff in my life is somehow exceptional. Both worry and stress reek of arrogance. They declare our tendency to forget that we’ve been forgiven, that our lives here are brief, that we are headed to a place where we won’t be lonely, afraid, or hurt ever again, and that in the context of God’s strength, our problems are small, indeed.

Why are we so quick to forget God? Who do we think we are?

[Crazy Love, chapter 2, pp 41-42]

I will regularly descend into agitation, frustration and stress.

When it comes, it's as though there's something other than blood in my veins; a drug that sets every inch of me on edge. My reactions are short-fused and brimming with contempt and entitlement - my mind is consumed by thoughts about the idiocy and inferiority of whoever has triggered this Jeckyll/Hyde creature, or whoever has been so unfortunate to stumble inadvertently into its path.

I hate pride.

So freaking much.